Thursday, October 17, 2013

My Mind


This is how my mind works...

I'm cooking dinner yesterday (while trying to keep Penny out of every cabinet) and watching New Girl. Zooey Deschanel is waltzing around her apartment in some adorable getup that looks effortless and I think to myself "man, I don't look that good when I'm hanging around the house. Maybe I need to try harder...and get rid of the ugly lounge clothes that are my go-to." I started feeling really bad about myself and let my mind indulge in all sorts of lies (and, of course, coming up with a list on how I should change this). 

But then after a few minutes, I remembered that (1) this is a TV show for goodness sake (2) Zooey Deschanel has a team of people making her cute all the time and (3) the majority of her day doesn't consist of caring for the needs of a busy one year old and a husband. And ultimately, I had to force myself to remember that my value will. never. rest in my ability to look cute without trying (or to pretend that I'm always put together). My value lies solely in the Lord and the way He sees me. 

There's nothing wrong with putting effort into an appearance as a woman. In fact, I think it's important to take care of ourselves. But in reality, the fact that my go-to house clothes are high school t-shirts and leggings with a hole in the thigh (every. single. one.) doesn't make me less valuable in God's eyes. And maybe I should stop comparing myself to celebrities and cool mom-bloggers... yeah, that's probably it. 

Am I alone in this? Someone HAS to feel what I feel from time to time. I can't be the ONLY one who actually looks like a mess when she's not trying... right?     right?

Sorry, rant over!

3 comments:

Allison said...

I'm not a mom yet, but I feel you. Totally. I do feel beautiful as a pregnant woman and I haven't looked at is (as I believe many women do) as a sentence on my body. I'm totally comfortable in my skin... maybe not my clothes right now, but that's another story. I have to confess, even seeing your beautiful new photo made me think, "whoa" and lament over my climb-out-of-bed-and-slump-into-work attire which I am currently donning. But I think we can keep each other real. Wear the leggings with the holes, I say. Our value IS in the Lord. And, for what it's worth, you are beautiful inside and out, sweet friend. Thanks for sharing and being vulnerable.

Unknown said...

My child, from the first day I held you, I prayed that God would use your life for something so special and that He would make all of your dreams come true. He's fulfilled two, almost three of those dreams....holey leggings or not. You are created in the image of Almighty God and if you were dressed in clothes of Queens, you could not be any more beautiful in my mind than you are when you're rocking my sweet granddaughter or cooking for my wonderful son-in-law or dreaming of my new granddaughter's arrival. And if you have everything but you have not love.....then you have nothing. You are loving so well.....and that's all you truly need. And for that, I love you even more than the day I first held you.
Mom

Samantha said...

None of it is real, babe. You're definitely not alone. Excuse this article's brash language, but I think it's pretty interesting.

http://jezebel.com/the-parks-recreation-characters-sure-do-spend-a-fuc-576267639

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