Monday, January 21, 2013

Settling In

So far the move to Omaha has been bearable. I have been able to maintain a fairly positive attitude and I've even accepted that this is most likely going to be home for a long time unless the Lord decides otherwise. I have enjoyed having a neighborhood and a house (rather than an apartment) and with intentional gratitude I have managed to escape almost all of my moments of discontent. And let me tell you I've had many...(prone to wander, Lord, I feel it). 

My days as a stay at home mom can seem a little mundane at times. Though I feel like I'm constantly doing something, my checklist seems to go untouched most days. There are days where I didn't even bother to wipe off the smudged mascara from the day before because I knew I wouldn't be leaving the house. It's a balance that I'm still trying to find--knowing that it's okay if the laundry is still sitting in the dyer because I wanted to have a conversation with my girl instead. 

But even though my days seem to be filled with dirty diapers and milk-stained clothes, I am finding there is a lot to benefit from it (besides the obvious fact that I am SO lucky to be raising a child). Living day to day with intentional gratitude has caused me to find joy in the smallest things...a bubble bath (even if it doesn't last long), a clean and quiet home, the scent of a candle, the gorgeous light that shines through my bedroom window. These are things I would have never noticed when my life was racing 100mph. I was quickly cleaning our room while Penny was taking her nap today and the sunshine stopped me in my tracks. I sat on the bed and soaked it in for a few minutes. So deeply grateful for it...the sun! Such a simple thing! I'm thankful for a life that allows me to bask in even the smallest gifts...the ones that are overlooked every day.
I feel myself losing steam. Wanting to stay inside rather than make friends with the neighbors, wanting to tip toe around Omaha rather than conquer it, letting it know that I will not be defeated this time. I'll be okay, this I know. And I'll trust that the Lord knows what he's doing...because He does :)

In order to encourage my resolution of a thankful life, I created a space that was easily accessible and prepped with all of the essentials...a gratitude drawer, if you will. It's too easy for me to make excuses when it comes to expressing gratitude, but this drawer prevents me from doing so. 
The essentials are obvious: note cards, envelopes, and stamps, but I also plan on keeping a book of addresses and a gratitude booklet--jotting down things I'm thankful for and things that others have done in my life. I get so excited when I have a letter to write now that it's all organized!
We aren't far into the year, but my resolution of a thankful heart has made all the difference in this time of change. When I focus on even the littlest of gifts, I have less time to think about the discomfort of our present circumstance. I'm hopeful that, one day, Omaha won't seem so faceless and for the days when I still have doubt, I will gave thanks.

J.

2 comments:

*Crystal Gustafson* said...

You are one strong woman and an inspiration, indeed. Love you!

Allison Nichole said...

I almost bought those cards at TJ Maxx! I loved it the instant I got one in the mail from you. I need to organize my desk...badly. And invest in an address book. Right now I use an excel spreadsheet on my desktop.

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