Two Precious Lines

(Baby bean's first show: She & Him!)

Up to this point, my life is not at all what I expected it to be at age 23. And praise God for that!

As a teenager, I had big plans of leaving Nebraska as soon as I could and I dreamed of being a successful career woman. God had other plans :)

One great love and a baby later I found that my calling (and now one of my biggest passions) is to be a mother and a homemaker. There is nothing more fulfilling than being certain that I'm doing what I was created to do. Following God's plan works like that, I guess.

As Truman and I started our lives together I had dreams of a large family. Those dreams grew when Penny entered our lives. The beginning of motherhood was SO hard (and still is) but I felt whole as a mother. Giving life to one of God's children is a high calling and I was honored to be chosen to mother Penny. I couldn't shake the feeling of wanting to experience it all over again. I felt ready to continue growing our family, but God was telling me to be patient. I'm not good at the patience thing. Being young, married, with an intentional first baby is a rare thing in our culture. So the thought of a second baby so soon resulted in a long of strange responses. I wanted to check my motives. Was this a competition thing? Was I feeling like I needed to keep up? Was I unsatisfied with just one baby? (A ridiculous question, if you ask me.) Was I focusing too much on the future and not staying in the present? 

After a lot of prayer with Truman, I realized that this desire for another baby wasn't about a status or number, but about continuing to do what God has called me to do: mother. The question was when was the timing right? Truman felt that it was best to wait until a suspected promotion with his job (he's rocking that, by the way). He got a promotion on May 29th. On May 30th I had two positive pregnancy tests. How's that for timing!? God sure does have a sense of humor. 

As always, there are a lot of uncertainties ahead of us. I'm a few weeks away from being through my first trimester so I'm currently learning how to let go of my need for control (because I have none) and trust that God's plan is perfect. It's hard not to fear the "m" word but I'm daily having to give my fears to Him. I SO aware that two little ones really close in age is going to keep my hands full, but I embrace that! Lord willing, for the next 20+ years I will have a house full of kiddos making messes, playing loudly, spilling milk, and leaving grass-stained clothes everywhere. Taking care of my family is what I'm good at. It may not be good compared to someone else's standards and I only succeed by the grace of God, but if He chooses to bless us with multiple children then I say bring it on!

We are so excited for baby #2 and, once again, I'm left breathless at the creation of human life.

Cheers to a messy, chaotic, challenging, and FULL life!

(And if you're the praying kind, prayers that our little one makes it through the next few weeks would be appreciated. Thank you!)

J.