tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17363326842567989072024-03-13T11:29:35.628-07:00Notes From A RagamuffinExperiencing the undeserved joys of life by the grace of God.Notes From A Ragamuffinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17069043314107879017noreply@blogger.comBlogger233125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1736332684256798907.post-53418640129795934152014-03-31T14:23:00.002-07:002014-03-31T14:23:16.282-07:00Juniper Grace // 2 Months<div style="text-align: center;">
Miss June has been a part of our family for a little over two months now. </div>
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Things are just as crazy as we expected them to be and I LOVE it. Seriously. Even when I'm crying (or cursing) in my pajamas with dried spit up and two upset girls I can't imagine myself doing anything else. Penny has adjusted very well to having a baby around (much better than I anticipated) and it is so fun to see her interact with her sister. Because I'm either cleaning or napping during any free time I have, I haven't updated the blog in a while so I thought I'd share a few photos of June's development thus far.</div>
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As I continue to learn about June and watch her personality grow, I'm finding that she is very sweet and sensitive. She knows what she likes and doesn't like and will be sure to tell us immediately. She is very smiley and has the most adorable coos. She loves to be held/carried and wants to bounce constantly. She sleeps very well for her age and is easily put to sleep most of the time. As much as I love the first few weeks of life where they are sleepy and super cuddly, I really love when they begin to interact. It's so excited to know that we have many "firsts" ahead of us. I'm so excited for when she'll reach the age that she and Penny can play together. I don't want to rush too quickly through these first months, but I look forward to the future.</div>
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Every time I attempt to take nice pictures of the girls, chaos ensues (notice the footprints in June's 2 month pictures...). I'm certain that for every decent picture I get, I have to take 30 awful ones first. So either those trendy mom-bloggers spend all stinkin' day taking photos of their children, or I'm just the exception where life doesn't always look pretty, fashionable, and well lit :) Regardless, I've accepted it, embraced it, and even managed to find beauty and joy (and humor) in it. For instance, notice a toddler hand in the upper right corner stealing a toy that she is convinced is hers...</div>
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As I said earlier, one of my greatest joys is getting to watch Penny interact with her sister. It has been fun to see the caring, compassionate side of her come out. Whenever she walks by June she points and says "buh-bay" and if she's sleeping she'll put her finger to her nose and say "sssssss". If June is crying, she will pat her head (usually too forcefully) or try to shove the pacifier in her mouth. I've caught her trying to pick June up or feed her snacks, as well. Her innocence in trying to help if very sweet. I'm always amazed at how quickly she learns from me. It didn't take long before I saw her picking up her babies and burping them or rocking with them...followed by tossing them across the living room. I definitely don't do that.</div>
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I'm so thankful for my little June-bug and look forward to the many memories we'll make as a family of four this spring and summer.</div>
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Snuggling with daddy.</div>
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Those pouty lips are my favorite.</div>
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Notes From A Ragamuffinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17069043314107879017noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1736332684256798907.post-84094904372089563432014-02-01T17:10:00.001-08:002014-02-01T17:10:45.495-08:00Juniper Grace // Birth Story Pt. 2<div style="text-align: center;">
I slowly waddled my way across the hospital to labor and delivery (the midwives office is attached) and tried to walk through each contraction. Even though I was certain that I wanted the epidural, I was really nervous that it was going to slow things down so I remember telling the nurse that I could still manage the contractions for a little while longer (but every time another contraction hit I found myself changing my mind!). We unpacked our things and settled into the room. I finally lost my mucous plug when I went to the bathroom (something I was expecting to lose before labor started). Truman put the playlist on, my mom got the essential oil diffuser running, and the nurse hooked me up to the monitor. I wasn't cold, but my body started shaking with nerves. I was nervous for the procedure of the epidural and I was nervous that baby girl's entry into the world was going to be as violent as Penny's was (vacuum, episiotomy). My mom massaged my legs while I took deep breaths of my essential oils, read through scripture, and texted friends/family with updates. It helped to get my mind off of delivery.</div>
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When the anesthesiologist arrived, he whipped open the curtain and said "someone having a baby!?" He was really fun and liked to crack jokes so that helped to relieve some nerves. I warned him that he would need to talk me through the procedure and he gladly did. I sat on the edge of the bed while Truman and the nurse held my hand. The worst part was having to sit still through the contractions. There were only a few times where the pressure/pain of the tube was really uncomfortable and I just repeated "I can do this" over and over. I remember feeling a little silly giving myself a pep talk in front of the nurse--I'm sure she's seen worse. The anesthesiologist commented that he liked my playlist, told us congratulations, and was on his way. </div>
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As my legs and abdomen slowly started to numb I was able to relax a bit. The break from the contractions was much needed. I wasn't keeping track of time, but the next few hours were spent resting as much as possible. Truman went to the cafeteria to grab lunch while my mom stayed with me. The pain of the contractions was gone, but I still felt a lot of pressure through each one and it was causing me to be slightly nauseous. She was sitting on the edge of my bed rubbing my arm when I felt an increased amount of pressure in my abdomen. All of a sudden this loud burst of noise comes over the monitor and my water breaks (bursts, actually) causing us both to jump. My mom shot off the bed and we laughed hysterically. Thankfully I was covered by sheets, but we got a good laugh at how startled we were. The midwife came in to check me (I'm assuming around 1 or 1:30pm) and I was dilated to 8-9cm. I was SO relieved to hear that the epidural hadn't slowed the process and that I was getting close to delivery. Kali showed up, ready to take pictures and the nurses started to prepare. The epidural was slightly wearing off on my right side so I was having to work again through contractions. </div>
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Aside from actually meeting my girl, this is my favorite part of labor and delivery.</div>
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The mood in the air changes. The nurses start lay out and prepare all the tools and the adrenaline starts to pump. Instead of dreading the next contraction, I welcome it. Knowing that I'm minutes away from holding my baby. Instead of fearing the pushing, I buckle down and focus with all of my energy. Knowing there is only one way out. The midwife said she could feel her head right there and I felt a wave of excitement and giddiness. I felt pressure in my bottom with each contraction and she told me I could start to push when the next one came. </div>
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This is SUCH an unflattering picture, but I pushed with all my might, listening to her every instruction and taking a break when the contraction was over. I was excited for the next one to come, hoping each time that it would bring me my baby. We did this through a few more contractions and her head started to crown. My midwife asked if I wanted to reach down and touch her head and I said no way. I know that some people find that really beautiful, but I did not want to feel what was about to come plunging through me (sorry). They laughed and I pushed. My midwife was so calm and relaxed through the whole thing, like she was making me a cup of coffee. She casually asked Truman if he wanted to come around a catch his daughter and since he isn't bothered by all the gore he gladly accepted the invitation. As the next contraction approached I knew this was it. I could feel her pushing her way through my body slowly. I had my eyes closed to focus and my midwife shouted "open your eyes! open your eyes!" as June was pulled out into the world at 2:42pm. I'm so thankful she did that so I could see this beautiful, purple, wet bundle lifted into the air and placed on my chest.</div>
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I was crying hysterically. So overjoyed. I think the first thing I muttered was "oh, I love that beautiful cry!" June curled up onto my chest and I held her tight for a long time. </div>
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My words just don't do justice the joy I felt to be holding my healthy baby girl safely in my arms. Truman cut the cord and kissed me through my tears as we marveled again at this amazing entrance of new life. </div>
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June sat quietly through all the poking and prodding and I anxiously awaited getting to hold her again. Kali was sure to make note of the song that was playing when she was born "Call Me the Breeze" by Beth Orton. My midwife informed me that I had only second degree tearing and I was SO thankful for that (with Penny I had fourth degree). </div>
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Truman and I spent some quiet time alone with her in the room to settle from all the excitement. Penny had been patiently waiting in the lobby with her Uncle Jamison, my dad, and Jeanette.</div>
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She wasn't quite sure what to think of her baby sister the first time she saw her. She just kept pointing in curiosity. After a few hours, everyone started to shuffle out and the nurse prepared to take us to our room. She wanted me to go to the bathroom first so I slowly walked with her and as I reached the toilet I felt my body get very faint and start to fade. I've never passed out before and I was trying really hard to stay awake. I thought that I had succeeded and when I came to I said "whoa I almost passed out!" She laughed and said "honey, you did pass out." I quickly realized that as I noticed the other four nurses that were now standing around me. I believe I called them "blue people" haha. I got back into bed so they could hook me back up to the IV. I was slightly bummed to end such a great delivery with this. Regardless, I still had my healthy baby girl to delight in. We eventually got into our room and they plastered a sign to my door saying "leaf" labeling me as a fall risk! The rest of the family got a good laugh out of that and Truman now calls me "little leaf".<br />
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I am so happy and blessed with Juniper's labor and delivery. It went so much smoother than I anticipated and the recovery has been much less painful. She is my sleepy little snuggler and I am loving all the cuddle time we've had. God has blessed us in so many ways and I am so excited to embrace this new life as a family of four.<br />
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Cheers, J. <br />
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Notes From A Ragamuffinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17069043314107879017noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1736332684256798907.post-92074741765471999702014-01-31T10:29:00.001-08:002014-01-31T10:29:09.801-08:00Juniper Grace // Birth Story pt. 1<div style="text-align: center;">
Pardon my language, but there is something about giving birth a second time that makes you feel like a total badass. It confirms that the first time wasn't just a fluke. You are, in fact, a strong woman with the ability to birth a human being...and survive!! Because before June, I truly doubted whether or not I was tough enough to do this again. I am so happy to report that bringing her into the world was a better experience than I could have hoped for and I am so, so grateful for it. I spare few details in a birth story because I think the process of giving life is wonderful and needs no censorship. However, if you're not into that sort of thing, this is your warning :) </div>
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This is how our sweet, sleepy, screechy Juniper Grace entered the world and bettered our family...<br />
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On Thursday morning, I woke up with a heavy heart. There were no cramps, no contractions, no sign of a mucous plug. I was officially carrying June longer than I had carried Penny and I was SO certain all throughout my pregnancy that I would go early again. Fears that I would be overdue started to creep in. I was tired, uncomfortable, and everything was ready for her. Playing the waiting game was torture and that morning, specifically, I lost it. As Truman left for work I was crying in frustration (he was really sweet and offered to take the day off, but an emotional wife isn't a legitimate reason to do so). I spent the day at home with Penny decorating the house for Valentine's Day in an effort to get my mind off of things. I prayed frequently that the Lord would give me patience and peace about His timing...and He did. </div>
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I went to bed that night with pretty frequent and painful braxton hicks. A tiny part of me thought "this might be something" but I had been over analyzing everything for weeks that I was tired of being disappointed. I fell asleep around midnight and woke up at 2am with a terribly strong back cramp. It felt like my lower back was on fire. I tried to sleep through it, but couldn't so I sat up to see if it would go away. It didn't. Penny's labor started with such mild cramps that I wasn't anticipating this intensity right away, but I knew this was something. I decided to text my mom to let her know that I was in the beginning stages of labor. My heart was racing in excitement/panic and I was still drowsy from waking up. I had to retype the text message three times and this was STILL what I could come up with...I've never been a morning person.</div>
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I woke Truman up to let him know that I was going to get up and see how quickly they were coming. He went back to sleep, knowing we potentially had a long day ahead of us and I contacted friends and family. For the next few hours, I paced our quiet house packing a bag, taking a shower (I even put on makeup thinking "maybe I'll actually look decent in labor pictures!" Ha.) All the while stopping every 7 minutes or so to endure a contraction. I was surprised that they were coming so quickly and so powerfully. </div>
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My mom showed up around 4am and by that time I was already feeling very tired. I wanted so badly to try and sleep but the contractions were so intense that I wouldn't be able to. She massaged my legs and feet, trying to help me to relax. Penny woke up at 5am, wanting to help :)</div>
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Thinking we weren't to far away from heading to the hospital, I told my sister to head up so she could be around to watch Penny/take pictures of the delivery. The second she texted me that they were on their way my contractions started to slow in frequency and duration. I was a little discouraged, hoping this wasn't going to be false labor. I was also worried that she was going to drive all the way up here (missing class) for no reason. Thankfully they picked up an hour later. At about 6am, the house was quiet again. Kali, her husband, Truman, and I were all asleep (or trying to sleep) on the living room floor while Penny and my mom were sleeping in other rooms. I would wake Truman every 6 or 7 minutes and he would rub my lower back as I winced in pain and grabbed the carpet. </div>
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As the sun rose, Kali made cinnamon rolls and everyone slowly started to wake up, feeling slightly more prepared for the long day ahead of us. I spent most of the following hours leaning over a chair while my mom rubbed peppermint oil on my back through contractions. Penny, of course, had to be part of the action so she would come over every now and then to help rub my back (or to ask for a back rub herself). Around 10am my contractions were coming 5-7 minutes apart and lasting 1 to 1:20 minutes. They were heavy waves of fiery pain in my lower back and all I could do was breathe (occasionally moan) and whisper He is strong over and over. My mom and Truman kept bugging me to call the midwife, but my instructions were to wait until contractions were 4 minutes apart. I didn't want to get to the hospital too early. However, after lots of persuasion, I decided to call and at least inform them of where I was in the process. They gave us the "go" and told us to come in so I could be checked. The thought of driving 20 minutes across town in the freezing cold made me miserable, but I knew it was the next step in meeting our babe. </div>
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So off we went! I clenched the side of the car through each contraction and explained how worried I was that I wouldn't be dilated. I sat in the waiting room trying to look as composed as possible in front of all the other women. But honestly, how composed can one look in yoga pants and UGG boots? (Don't judge me.) When we were finally called to a room, the midwife listened for a heartbeat and checked for dilation. As always, it hurt like hell and she couldn't even feel the tip of my cervix. I got tears in my eyes remembering all too well the same news we got with Penny. She told me not to worry and that I should go to the mall down the street and walk around.... what? I loved this midwife, but I wanted to put my palm to her face. I was in SO much pain and I did not want to venture out into the cold and walk around. I could barely walk from the car to the office! She said if I wanted, she could check one more time and try to feel all the way back to my cervix. I truly contemplated saying no (SO glad I didn't). Through a few tears and the squeezing of Truman's hand, she said very casually "oh! Okay, you're 5 centimeters." Sweet relief. Because I wanted an epidural, she suggested that we head up to labor and delivery to get things started. Everything felt confirmed. It was officially time to meet our baby girl. As the midwife walked out of the room she said you're having a baby today!" My heart was full.<br />
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...to be continued!</div>
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Notes From A Ragamuffinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17069043314107879017noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1736332684256798907.post-66544641933853983252014-01-22T12:37:00.000-08:002014-01-22T12:37:56.186-08:00New Year <div style="text-align: center;">
I have been wanting to update the blog for so long. So many thoughts and moments I've wanted to share, but every minute I have to myself I'm either sleeping or taking a warm bath. The holiday season was very low key for us. We casually walked into the new year, telling 2013 not to let the door hit it on the way out. Though we were blessed in many ways, it was by far the most challenging year for us as a family and we were ready to see it go. As we draw close to the end of January, I find myself quite pregnant and waiting anxiously to meet our daughter. I'm 39 weeks tomorrow and already carrying her longer than I carried Penny. Because Penny came unexpectedly, this "waiting period" is new to me and even though I'm not a fan of it, I'm trying to indulge in each day. Enjoy the quiet moments that I still have to myself. Soak up the time I have left of her inside me, every kick and hiccup. </div>
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(38 weeks)</div>
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At almost 39 weeks I'm feeling pretty good. Besides the fact that I'm hardly sleeping, I don't feel too uncomfortable and haven't had any real contractions yet (just super uncomfortable braxton hicks). Though we don't have an elaborate nursery ready and waiting, we have a little corner in our room ready to be filled with her presence. Hospital bags are packed, playlist is composed, and the back of our car is jammed tight with two car seats. We're as ready and we'll ever be and I plan on spending the last however many days mentally preparing myself for labor.</div>
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Miss Penny still has no idea what's about to happen, but she sure does enjoy lifting up my shirt and patting my tummy (quite aggressively!). I have so enjoyed our last weeks together as a duo, but I'm excited for her to be a big sister and find her place in that role (even if it's rocky at first). As always, she is constantly changing and making my job as a mother a true joy. She understands a lot of what we're saying and is always trying to repeat new words. Her sweet little voice melts my heart and I love how excited and proud she gets when we praise her for saying something. Lately, her favorites are banana "manah", potty, bath "bah!", "nigh nigh", and bur "buhh!" </div>
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We spend lots of time dancing to music and reading books. She loves to help me around the house by taking neatly folded piles of clothes and transporting them across the room :), helping me shut the dishwasher, and taking the groceries out of the grocery bag. I have to admit that the mess is hard for a perfectionist, like myself, to deal with at times but the look of content on her face when I praise her is far better than a tidy house. </div>
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She is turning into a beautiful little girl and I am so thankful for the spunk and sweetness she brings to our family. </div>
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Being the obsessive list-maker that I am, I usually find myself with a long list of goals at the beginning of a new year. I'm always wishing that I ate healthier, worked out more (or at all!), spent more time in the kitchen, had more fun activities for Penny, kept a tighter budget, invested more in the friendships in my life, etc. I'll always be striving to improve in those areas, but instead I want to focus on one, big goal for the year 2014--living with intention. I'm still trying to figure out what this looks like on a day to day basis. Not waking up at 4am to read or run a million miles (though I applaud you folks who do), but practical, realistic things like putting my phone down (a VERY hard one for a lonely, stay at home mom), investing in my marriage and learning about my husband (and hell, even going on a date every now and then!), making prayer and thanksgiving a priority, memorizing scripture, and putting effort into my appearance (hello showers and real clothes) without needing value from it. It's far too easy to wish away my days as a stay at home mom, waiting for 5pm when Truman gets home or living for the weekend. I want to focus on making each day special (even if it's not glamorous) rather than always trying to live one step ahead.</div>
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I'm excited for this year. I'm excited to work through the messy of newborn stage, to not be pregnant and exhausted this summer, to fall deeper in love with my husband (cheesy, sorry), and to even re-discover my creative, artistic side while being a momma. Most importantly as we go forward as a family, I strive to be a woman who puts her family first, serves without needing praise, laughs amidst chaos, embraces mess, isn't attached to or concerned with stuff, and craves Jesus more than anything else.</div>
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Here's to hoping there's a precious little newborn in my arms SOON!</div>
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Cheers, J. </div>
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Notes From A Ragamuffinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17069043314107879017noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1736332684256798907.post-80098096601343065082013-11-13T14:00:00.001-08:002013-11-13T14:06:15.215-08:00Penny Emerson : 13 Months // Third Trimester<div style="text-align: center;">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiWRmYGZdGDt7lwHfo_wxl2_1GZq18XDiQvteumKDrWkU0oWFF41TAc2YO5XcMEu1ykxirXovGHfNHyWSXpUFztq5gK7IeVVJL7Y7A5rcvqZySZi8DnCUc__kXGuFUYHzwZaSkCzmP4UGs/s1600/penny5.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiWRmYGZdGDt7lwHfo_wxl2_1GZq18XDiQvteumKDrWkU0oWFF41TAc2YO5XcMEu1ykxirXovGHfNHyWSXpUFztq5gK7IeVVJL7Y7A5rcvqZySZi8DnCUc__kXGuFUYHzwZaSkCzmP4UGs/s400/penny5.jpg" width="266" /></a></div>
<span style="font-size: x-small;">Photos taken by Blue House Fotos</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg5K7t9a7mdZPcFi_wklNjck4B07PZ6YphD1yZlZAUZ751mL7Mqi5BzjvIqdqoYlWBaLyQ318oZaWVrnjrAxksoSNCFtDdV33pkdcP2nd5Y9Zz5YS2M0WLwuKbGtLdn9CaqGTBeOgRJlxA/s1600/penny4.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg5K7t9a7mdZPcFi_wklNjck4B07PZ6YphD1yZlZAUZ751mL7Mqi5BzjvIqdqoYlWBaLyQ318oZaWVrnjrAxksoSNCFtDdV33pkdcP2nd5Y9Zz5YS2M0WLwuKbGtLdn9CaqGTBeOgRJlxA/s400/penny4.jpg" width="266" /> </a></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;">I have gained a new accessory and her name is Penny Emerson. </span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;">It seemed as though overnight Penny reached the clingy, mama's girl, stranger anxiety phase. I have spent multiple nights at 3am with a scared baby draped across my pregnant body, nestled under my chin, trying so desperately to fall asleep on me (but honestly, there's not much real estate with a large bump in the way). I really enjoy this snuggly side of her. I love when she rests her head on my shoulder if I pick her up from her crib and sometimes it feels nice when she comes running to me for comfort. I like that she needs me and I like that I can comfort her. </span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjP3D_Mg7I7xB5qWhoII27cclxjKTuCaaii-p6a13up9Aw7ED5jTMjTvc20eUtq5jBumPm6pZmayXSrU_FFSSMcYJPp1hdfBsqZjTWyyznMpvbJQcr4-WO4gPqsAz3vEtWkfWKqFGCrYdk/s1600/penny1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjP3D_Mg7I7xB5qWhoII27cclxjKTuCaaii-p6a13up9Aw7ED5jTMjTvc20eUtq5jBumPm6pZmayXSrU_FFSSMcYJPp1hdfBsqZjTWyyznMpvbJQcr4-WO4gPqsAz3vEtWkfWKqFGCrYdk/s400/penny1.jpg" width="266" /></a></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"> </span> <span style="font-size: small;">It was reassuring to hear the doctor confirm that this stage is completely normal. Parenting has been great at shattering any judgements/ideas I had before Penny. When I saw clingy children I used to assume that they needed a little more tough love--that their parents weren't doing them any favors by babying them. But as we've reached this difficult stage I'm finding that it is physically impossible for me to lay in bed and listen to my sweet girl crying hysterically for her mama in the middle of the night. If there is one thing I've learned from parenting thus far it's that there is no one way. As a personal choice I choose to forgo tough love (when necessary) and cuddle the crap out of my baby until she feels safe again. </span><br />
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<span style="font-size: small;">This means learning to do lots of things one-handed with a baby on my hip. This also means a sore, pregnant back and extra braxton hicks at times :)</span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgffCdGmT1OrIUvB2uJKQ5A-xGmrL92p6Oqujn_m4f-_Pp7qHIbDZB9H0I-uwQjTPOwGM2Q9ntewimIufH2ZhaZ7rkY1Z9Ac5WU1jXiWMiCxOoE04aspQTrBlC_U-95lMZo0UBX_6DSmzs/s1600/penny2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="266" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgffCdGmT1OrIUvB2uJKQ5A-xGmrL92p6Oqujn_m4f-_Pp7qHIbDZB9H0I-uwQjTPOwGM2Q9ntewimIufH2ZhaZ7rkY1Z9Ac5WU1jXiWMiCxOoE04aspQTrBlC_U-95lMZo0UBX_6DSmzs/s400/penny2.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"> Penny's personality has really been exposed within the last month. It's no shocker that she's very emotional and vocal. She gets incredibly frustrated when she can't communicate something and I try to remember that when she's convulsing on the floor because I wouldn't let her put the drumstick in her mouth. She LOVES attention (is there a child that doesn't?) and her eyes light up when I praise her for doing something. She is such a ham and loves to make us laugh--she knows that we get a kick out of the snuffy face so she does it often. She thinks every photo is "dada" and she can communicate by shaking her head and saying "no." She spends the majority of her day pointing to everything and saying "wassat?!" (what's that?). She head bangs to music like she's been a hipster for years and she loves when I pick her up to dance around the living room. She thrives when she is with others. She loves to play with other kids (even if we haven't quite understood the sharing thing yet) and I am so excited for her to have a sister soon. It's going to be a tough transition, especially if she's still glued to my leg, but I know we are giving her a great gift--a sibling and a friend.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;">The older she gets the more I am appreciating that I get to be the one to watch her learn each day. I constantly feel unqualified to be the one teaching her about everything, but I'm still glad it's me. It's not glamorous, but I truly love it. </span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;">On another note, I have officially reached the last leg of this pregnancy! Though it has been more challenging with a little one running around, it really has flown by. </span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"> Aside from the discomfort that I've had from the beginning, this pregnancy has been extra special because my placenta isn't in the front. I can feel baby girl moving so much to the point that it scares me sometimes! Even when I'm exhausted and uncomfortable at night it's impossible to be discouraged when there is life moving underneath my hand. I'll never stop being amazed and this bouncy belly will never get old.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"> My midwife said I'm measuring larger than 29 weeks but she assured me it was due to extra fluid and that I would not be pushing out a 10 pound baby...so that's always nice to hear :) As if life doesn't already get busy with the holiday season, I'm feeling a little anxiety and pressure as I prepare for baby. With all the amazing blogs and online inspiration these days it's hard not to feel like I'm behind if I don't have an immaculate nursery ready and waiting for my baby. The truth is, our baby girl will reside in the corner of our room for quite a while. And along with every other aspect of our life, I'm challenged with an attitude of content. So my goal for the next 2ish months (!!) is to try and free myself of the pressure of preparation. To take it slow, relax when necessary, enjoy my time with Penny-girl, *enjoy* the process of getting ready for a baby, and slowly prepare myself for the crazy-incredible thing that is labor. Oh, and pick a stinkin' name for our girl! </span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;">I want to be present and grateful for every turtle-speed rotation in bed, for every ache in my hip, for every bout of hiccups in my tummy at 2am, and for every gentle and not-so-gentle nudge in my pelvis that says "hey mom, I'm still here and you're doing one of the most amazing things a woman is called to do--give life."</span></div>
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Notes From A Ragamuffinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17069043314107879017noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1736332684256798907.post-65317107470365614152013-11-11T12:45:00.003-08:002013-11-11T12:51:13.490-08:00The Chase<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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(Try to ignore the fact that my blog title sounds like a Miley Cyrus song--pre-twerking, of course.)</div>
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Is it me, or are we trying to skip Thanksgiving this year? </div>
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I was overhearing a conversation at the grocery store yesterday where a girl was telling her friend that it just seems too early to be thinking Christmas already and I was so happy to hear that I'm not alone! The day after Halloween I felt myself feeling overwhelmed with Christmas. Wish lists, decorating ideas, traditions for our family, and above all the looming question of "how are we going to afford this!?" I found myself getting bitter about our financial situation (being a stay at home mom means giving up certain financial comforts) and being bitter about our house (even the fact that we don't have a fireplace!) and worrying that I won't have enough time/energy to decorate and fill our walls with impressive things....</div>
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And then I realized, it's slightly ironic that Thanksgiving comes right before Christmas. Maybe I'm just WAY behind on this epiphany, but I was so convicted that I was spending more time getting stressed about a holiday that is almost two months away (at the time) that it was causing me to be ungrateful and discontent. Those habits creep so easily into my day-to-day and during the month of November (and, uh, the rest of my life) I just want to be still. To indulge in the joy of the gifts I have been given. To not feel behind in planning for the next big thing. </div>
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Don't get me wrong, I seriously love the holiday season and I don't think there is any shame if someone wants to start celebrating early, but I noticed that all the hustle and bustle of preparing for Christmas way in advance was causing a lack of gratitude. And I don't want that for myself or my family. When I was little, I could have cared less about Thanksgiving because it didn't involved getting presents. I'd like the month of November--the gratitude month--to be just as important in our house as we prepare to celebrate the birth of our savior. Easier said than done, right? But I'm going to try to slow down. To rest in this time of family and food and for goodness sakes to quit lusting over the fancy, cozy homes of Pottery Barn and Pinterest. ONLY by the grace of God will I be free of expectations and busyness...and silly, worldly idols that are never easy to admit. </div>
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I have learned first hand that gratitude is not natural. It has to be cultivated. And as the mother of my home I take the responsibility very seriously to teach my children the importance of a thankful heart.</div>
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Cheers, J.</div>
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P.S. I'm not judging you if you've already whipped out the Christmas music. Do your thang.</div>
Notes From A Ragamuffinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17069043314107879017noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1736332684256798907.post-57078006680022437652013-10-27T14:26:00.003-07:002013-10-27T14:26:46.078-07:00Fall Weekend<div style="text-align: center;">
It was a fun weekend full of little memories I don't want to forget. </div>
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^^This little profile. We have this routine where she wakes up from her afternoon nap and watches me put my makeup on/do my hair from her crib. Yes, I'm admitting to frequently waiting until after lunch to even get ready. Mom life. She likes to hold my comb and rub it against her head like she's brushing her hair. I'm not going to be the one to tell her nothing's there...^^</div>
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^^The tree in our front yard is gorgeous right now. It's half yellow/half green and she likes to play in the leaves.^^</div>
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^^We found a park close to Truman's work one day and it had the BEST pile of leaves. She was so mad at me when I made her leave, but we had a blast throwing them back and forth.^^</div>
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^^Those two top teeth. That smile. Her giggle. I just can't.^^</div>
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^^We had a little family date Saturday at The Mill. She gets to wear mama's hat until I can find one that I actually like for her.^^</div>
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^^She's an escape artist, for sure. Trums taught her how to run. Terrible idea.^^</div>
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^^And I chopped my hair! I wasn't not ready to face another dry, Nebraska winter with a head full of hair and a baby. I feel lighter and I get to spend 20 less minutes in the shower and drying my hair...think of all the things I can do!^^</div>
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Notes From A Ragamuffinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17069043314107879017noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1736332684256798907.post-41028295554468123752013-10-22T10:30:00.004-07:002013-10-22T10:34:55.829-07:00Penny's First Birthday<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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This was the only decent shot I got of Penny on her first Birthday, but that's because we were having too much fun celebrating! (And this is exactly why we had Blue House Fotos take professional pictures of her :)</div>
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I was an emotional mama, as expected. I'm not sad at all that my baby is one, I just can't believe it happened so quickly. She was such a tiny little thing when she was born and now she's this little fireball walking around. It's super cheesy, but we really do fall more in love with her each day. </div>
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Forgive the low quality in the majority of these pictures, but these are a few of my favorites that captured the day. </div>
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^^ I purchased Penny's smash cake from Whole Foods and the pregnant, tired woman in me wanted to purchase the regular cake from them, as well. But unfortunately our budget wouldn't allow such laziness so I tackled it myself. It's nothing to write home about, but it was tasty and I was pleased with the end result! Most importantly, Penny thoroughly enjoyed her cake. ^^</div>
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^^Honestly...she acted like she's been eating cake for years. Looks like she's going to have a sweet tooth like her mama!^^</div>
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We're so thankful for the friends and family who were able to celebrate with us (and for those who were with us is spirit). Penny is loved by some wonderful people!</div>
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A few things about Penny at 12 months...</div>
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-She is attached to her bamboo blanket. She will frantically walk around the house looking for it and then dive into it when she finds it. It always has to be around her shoulders, like a cape, or over her head. I have no idea why walking around with a blanket over her head is appealing, but it's her thing. This has also caused a few run-ins with the wall...funny, but sad. </div>
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-The girl has her own language. She is SUCH a talker and she'll go on and on as if she knows exactly what she's saying. She's been saying "dada" for a while now, but she finally started saying "mama" this week. On the way to work this morning, we got her to say "hi dada!" over and over. It's so fun to hear her forming actual words.</div>
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-She's getting to the age where she knows when she's being disobedient. I will tell her "no" and she will continue to do it anyway. Though the cause for discipline has been scary, it has been good for me. I'm learning to be persistent and to stay calm when she throws a tantrum. She hates being in trouble and is really sensitive when I'm telling her no (it's kind of sweet to see a softer side of her, but then she'll go right back to doing what I just told her not to. Silly girl.) I must shake my head a lot, because Penny will walk up to things that are "no-no's" (like the stairs) shake her head like she's telling herself no and walk away. It cracks me up. </div>
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-She got a few babies for her birthday so we could start practicing the role of big sis. She walks up to her babies, squats down to give them kisses (slash bites their head), picks them up and then throws them across the room. I'm assuming the gentle thing will come with age :)</div>
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Looking forward to spending some quality time with my girl before we enter into survival mode :)</div>
Notes From A Ragamuffinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17069043314107879017noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1736332684256798907.post-90246811854427007982013-10-17T10:47:00.000-07:002013-10-17T10:47:44.238-07:00My Mind<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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This is how my mind works...</div>
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I'm cooking dinner yesterday (while trying to keep Penny out of every cabinet) and watching New Girl. Zooey Deschanel is waltzing around her apartment in some adorable getup that looks effortless and I think to myself "man, I don't look that good when I'm hanging around the house. Maybe I need to try harder...and get rid of the ugly lounge clothes that are my go-to." I started feeling really bad about myself and let my mind indulge in all sorts of lies (and, of course, coming up with a list on how I should change this). </div>
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But then after a few minutes, I remembered that (1) this is a TV show for goodness sake (2) Zooey Deschanel has a team of people making her cute all the time and (3) the majority of her day doesn't consist of caring for the needs of a busy one year old and a husband. And ultimately, I had to force myself to remember that my value will. never. rest in my ability to look cute without trying (or to pretend that I'm always put together). My value lies solely in the Lord and the way He sees me. </div>
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There's nothing wrong with putting effort into an appearance as a woman. In fact, I think it's important to take care of ourselves. But in reality, the fact that my go-to house clothes are high school t-shirts and leggings with a hole in the thigh (every. single. one.) doesn't make me less valuable in God's eyes. And maybe I should stop comparing myself to celebrities and cool mom-bloggers... yeah, that's probably it. </div>
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Am I alone in this? Someone HAS to feel what I feel from time to time. I can't be the ONLY one who actually looks like a mess when she's not trying... right? right?</div>
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Sorry, rant over!</div>
Notes From A Ragamuffinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17069043314107879017noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1736332684256798907.post-79701030455515124722013-10-01T09:31:00.001-07:002013-10-01T09:31:05.346-07:00Fall Essentials<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEibfE1g38s3zTZpJRtwGAP8OHtn79ubTmr9G-Yf2BaItM8bhp1Nd3xyj2DkpQ_GxXPnXBxlci5dxBjG-AVLwiPsd5jgaZjU9BTIaGINkKNWSqjQUR9Lx7BjV1jlVN-XRz3ML_9V_KwSu0w/s1600/IMG_0228.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEibfE1g38s3zTZpJRtwGAP8OHtn79ubTmr9G-Yf2BaItM8bhp1Nd3xyj2DkpQ_GxXPnXBxlci5dxBjG-AVLwiPsd5jgaZjU9BTIaGINkKNWSqjQUR9Lx7BjV1jlVN-XRz3ML_9V_KwSu0w/s400/IMG_0228.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
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Though we have been technically celebrating the fall season since September, I wanted to dedicate a blog to the way we welcome the new season. I used to hate fall. To me, it meant school beginning, summer ending, and the dreaded football games. Not to mention the fact that winter is right around the corner. However, as I've grown (and am no longer a student) I've come to love this season and all of the blessings it brings. One of them being cooler weather! I love, love, love the heat but my pregnancy and this summer's heat was just getting to be too much so the day I could turn off my AC and open the windows was a happy one!</div>
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I created a few unintentional traditions for our family throughout the past couple of years. One of the most important ones being the Bath and Body Works fall candles. My obsession with them is a little unhealthy. I'm very picky when it comes to candles but these few will forever be my favorite and I hope that as my children get older they will associate these scents with our home and the fall season. Every September I wait for the 2 for $20 sale and stock up on the Leaves and Nutmeg & Spice candles. I also tried the Pumpkin Caramel Latte candle and will be adding that to the favorites. </div>
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There's no need to ramble about my love for fall fashion. Chunky sweaters, boots, leggings. I love it all. I also love sporting the classic darker nail polishes this time of year.</div>
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This "tradition" is a dangerous one. Roasted peanuts and candy corn. Once you start you can't stop. </div>
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One of the most essential pieces to welcoming the fall is jazz music. I have great memories of running errands on Saturday mornings in Lincoln with the windows cracked and big band music playing on the radio. Truman also takes me to pick out an old record each year for my birthday. Some of my favorites are Benny Goodman, Glenn Miller, Billie Holiday, Nat King Cole, and of course Frank Sinatra. I don't know what it is, but there is something about a cool morning with jazz that makes it so rich. Try it, I dare you. </div>
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Aside from jazz, James Taylor's "October Road" is an absolute must and a tradition I will forever hold dear to my heart. One of my favorite childhood memories is of my dad playing that album through his old sound system in the fall. </div>
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Along with classic music, I also crave watching classic movies during this time of season. When Harry Met Sally being one of them. Maybe it's the autumn-inspire cover that gets me in the mood, but I watch it every fall! I think what I love most is Truman always pretends that he doesn't want to watch it, but he ends up laughing more than I do through the whole thing ;)</div>
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Last but not least, cheesy potato soup. This is one of my favorite recipes and it's the first soup I make of the season. </div>
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You can find the recipe <a href="http://www.justgetoffyourbuttandbake.com/2010/01/13/bacon-and-potato-soup/">here</a>.</div>
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Chalk it up to my need for organization, but traditions are really important to me. What I love so much about them is that half of the time they are completely unintentional. Most importantly, they create comfort and warmth in your home. I am so excited to continue traditions with my family and to also create new ones as we grow!</div>
Notes From A Ragamuffinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17069043314107879017noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1736332684256798907.post-74917201674580970412013-09-30T18:21:00.004-07:002013-09-30T18:21:42.278-07:00Arbor Day Farm / Kimmel Orchard<div style="text-align: center;">
We crossed another thing off my fall list by visiting Arbor Day Farm in Nebraska City. Last Year I was too pregnant and uncomfortable to even want to walk but I remember being really excited to take our baby girl the next year. We chose a beautiful day to go! The fact that Penny can walk is a blessing and a curse. It's SO fun to let her explore and be independent, but she loves it so much that any time we put her in the stroller or need to pick her up she has a MAJOR melt down. We found ways to get past it and still have a good time :) </div>
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We also stopped at Kimmel Orchard to do a little apple picking. The orchard was beautiful and they were selling lots of yummy treats, but we were all so tired from walking around at Arbor Farm that we just picked our apples and didn't hang around. Penny loved playing with the apples on the ground, but keeping her away from the rotten ones was difficult. She and Truman went to pick her very own little apple and they sat in the grass and ate while we picked :)</div>
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Making memories with my little family is just as wonderful and I dreamed it would be. Can't wait to bring baby sister here next year!</div>
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Notes From A Ragamuffinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17069043314107879017noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1736332684256798907.post-4007220894886045662013-09-22T21:20:00.002-07:002013-09-22T21:20:11.549-07:00Pumpkin Patch<div style="text-align: center;">
Watching Penny experience new things is my absolute favorite. </div>
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I've always loved the beginning of fall, but with a child I get to enjoy it differently. Suddenly buying pumpkins and attending cheesy-touristy pumpkin patches is so fun because it means I get to watch Penny have fun. The faces she makes when she's seeing something new are priceless. I have a long list of fall goodies I want to introduce her to and I'm thankful I could check one off this weekend. </div>
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We heard great things about Vala's Pumpkin Patch and it was a blast! I wasn't expecting it to be as huge as it was. We were definitely tired of all of the walking by the end of the day. Most of the activities were meant for older kids, but we found a few that Penny could enjoy.<br />
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Truman is such a great daddy. He was tired and sore from his Tough Mudder race this weekend, but he took Penny on this bouncy thing and she had so. much. fun. She was completely unaware of all the other kids bouncing as she made her way across the bubble so Truman spent most of his time protecting her. She's got a fearless attitude when it comes to adventure. She also threw quite the fit when we moved along to the next thing :)<br />
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It was a fun afternoon and she passed out the second we got in the car :)<br />
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I love enjoying this beautiful season with my family!</div>
Notes From A Ragamuffinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17069043314107879017noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1736332684256798907.post-11318263979790871172013-09-10T10:02:00.002-07:002013-09-10T10:09:01.890-07:00Penny Emerson : 11 Months<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Getting this little one to sit still is nearly impossible.</div>
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We have been giggling a lot this month. She loves making us laugh and I love seeing those two front teeth. I feel more affection from her lately. She gives lots of slobbery kisses and grabs our face. My FAVORITE night ever was a few nights ago when she was a little congested. She woke up crying in the middle of the night and when I went to pick her up, she nestled her head into my neck and fell asleep while I rubbed her back. I contemplated whether sleeping upright in the rocking chair was do-able because I just couldn't set her down, but eventually had to. She has been holding tightly to my arm when I hold her, as well. I just get the sense that she really wants to be close to her mama and I'm okay with that.</div>
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She is the most social baby. Going anywhere with her is so much fun. I'll be concentrating on my grocery list and I'll hear her giggle only to look up and see her smiling at a stranger down the aisle. She'll give a big grin for anyone who looks her way. She also refuses to face forward in the cart--always has to see what's going on. </div>
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She took her first steps the other day! I wasn't expecting it because she seems so content with crawling right now (she's a ridiculously fast crawler) but she was standing by herself, took three steps towards her books, and fell on her bottom. I screamed with excitement and she looked up at me like I was a crazy woman (I am). We keep trying to practice with her but she only wants to walk on her terms. She can only do 2-3 steps at a time right now but she sure does love the applause she gets afterward :)</div>
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She is SO much smarter than I realize. Anytime the TV is on or we are at a game, she will start clapping when she hears the audience/crowd clapping. Sometimes I won't even notice the audience cheering and she'll start clapping along. She's also speaking pretty well. I don't really think she knows what she's saying but she says "daddy" "hi" "uh oh" "yum" and "okay". And when I ask her what the cow says she puts her lips together and makes an "mmmm" sound. I geek out and get really excited every time :)</div>
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I went to pick her up from nursery this Sunday and as I stood in line I peered through the door and watched her playing with the other kids. She looked so grown up and it made me teary-eyed and so proud. (And then it hit me that if we decide to put her in a classroom I will be a hot mess when I can't watch her every move!) We stood at the back of the auditorium singing worship songs, her hand stretched high in the air, and I felt so incredibly happy to be her mama.</div>
Notes From A Ragamuffinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17069043314107879017noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1736332684256798907.post-77319383695236995892013-09-06T10:32:00.002-07:002013-09-06T10:36:13.901-07:00Baby Faeh // halfway<div style="text-align: center;">
I knew with our second baby I wouldn't have as much time to sit around and document every little change as the pregnancy progresses. I no longer pour over countless pregnancy websites and books trying to obtain every ounce of information I can. I do my best to be well-rested and well-fed and Penny takes care of the exercise :) It's a different experience the second time around. I have less time to think about the pregnancy which has actually made it go by WAY faster. I can hardly believe I'm already halfway there! We find out the gender in a week and I am SO excited. Knowing a little more about who your baby is makes it more personal and easier (for me) to bond. Plus I'm ready to start the naming battle with Truman (he hates everything I love!) In the meantime, I wanted to dedicate a little post to the first half of my pregnancy. </div>
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<b>12 Weeks</b></div>
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<b>13 Weeks</b></div>
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<b>15 Weeks</b></div>
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<b>16 Weeks</b></div>
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<b>19 Weeks</b><br />
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Though this pregnancy has seemed harder (with less time to relax and much more fatigue) I am loving being pregnant. With my new diet restrictions, I had a very hard time enjoying food (which wasn't the case last time around) but I feel pretty comfortable now. What surprised me most this time around was how sore I was from the beginning. Things didn't get uncomfortable until the 3rd trimester last time and I can barely walk around the block without having my legs and hips killing me.<br />
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My cravings have been pretty similar to last time's with a few exceptions. This time I am eating lots of apples with maple almond butter, jalapeno baked potato chips, cinnamon gum (?? haven't had this stuff since I was a kid and all the sudden started craving it!), chocolate, snow cones, and I crave anything and everything with pasta or bread in it. I've been able to find a few gluten free pasta dishes but for the most part I just can't indulge in that craving...major bummer.<br />
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I started feeling really faint movement at 16 weeks. At 18 weeks, I felt the first legitimate kick and bulge. With Penny, my placenta was in the front so I couldn't feel movement until about 20 weeks so I was thrilled to be enjoying it much earlier this time. It was so distinct, in fact, that Truman could feel it as well. I have been having a lot more braxton hicks contractions this time and they started at about 14 weeks. Unfortunately the cure for those is drinking water and I hate. drinking. water.<br />
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Being pregnant again has been a real blessing. My body is constantly reminding me that I need to slow down. I can't do it all and that's okay. I'm learning that taking care of myself and my family comes WAY before a clean house, fun homemaking things, and errands. It's hard to imagine what life will be like with two children. I remember with Penny it never felt real until right at the end. And of course people tell me over and over that it will only get harder--I'm so aware of that. And to be honest I fear it a little. The post partum depression, having a baby in the winter (when I'm already cold and depressed), the recovery process, the financial aspect, SLEEP. But if I have learned one thing in my first year of motherhood it's that the moments of complete exhaustion (the kind you didn't know was possible to reach), repetitive days, messy hair, and takeout for the third night in a row are SO worth the absolute joy of children. I know I can survive life with two babies because I have survived life with one. It will be messy, I'll struggle daily with leaning on the Lord instead of trying to "measure up" but I'm just so excited for it.<br />
Here's to hoping the second half is as fast as the first! (And that baby Faeh doesn't have his/her legs crossed at our ultrasound next week...)<br />
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J. </div>
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Notes From A Ragamuffinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17069043314107879017noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1736332684256798907.post-29353931605128966102013-08-20T21:02:00.000-07:002013-08-20T21:02:49.409-07:00Needed. <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I went in to check on her since she had been quiet for a while. Expecting to find a sleeping baby, I instead found a little girl sitting quietly with her blanket over her head. Not sure how it got there. Not sure why she didn't pull it off (she knows how) or why she didn't cry for help. I gently pulled it off and she reached her arms towards me begging to be picked up. </div>
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Lately she has been wanting to put herself to sleep. My days of rocking her to sleep in my arms are dwindling and even though I thought I would enjoy the extra time to myself I'm having a harder time letting go than I thought. I pulled her into my arms and she nestled into my neck. I thought I would give the ol' cradle a try so I gently swayed and hummed "you are my sunshine" with her long body wrapped around my waist. She didn't protest like usual. Instead she stared quietly at me with only a sliver of light coming from the living room. With each sway her eyelids grew heavy and the all-too familiar memories of her time spent in my arms came rushing back. The sweet relief of a surrendered baby. Comfortably curled in the bend of my arm, her right hand barely holding onto my shirt. She pierced her lips as though she was still sucking on her bottle and I began to cry.<br /><br />Suddenly that overwhelming gratitude came over me. The kind that you always know is there, but only shows it's face from time to time if you're lucky to let it in. I was so aware in that moment that this was a child of God. She wasn't mine, but she has been entrusted to me. What a high calling that is often overlooked. I began to pray over her in a deeper way than I ever had before. Prayers for inner beauty, a desire to know Christ and follow Him, a fascination with the stories of the Bible, a hunger for the Word. I prayed that she would be blessed with great, godly friendships and that she would fall in love with a man who lived for the Lord. I prayed that she would not fall into the traps of this world, that she wouldn't find value in the fleeting--appearance, possessions, status. That her life would be an example of the humility Christ endured for us. </div>
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My little girl will soon be one. She'll be entering a new stage of creativity, awareness, and connection. I'm excited for what's to come and I know that all too soon I'll blink and she'll be entering elementary school. I'll blink again and see her with diploma in hand. And, Lord help me, with another blink she'll be waltzing down the aisle in a gorgeous white dress. And I hope that in those moments, I'll be able to remember the time when all she needed was to be cradled by her mama. I am so blessed by this little life. </div>
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I sat there swaying back and forth, humming a little lighter each time the song started again, with a hand on my growing baby and an arm wrapped around my growing little girl. The light exhale through her nose brushing my face softly. I couldn't bring myself to lay her down. I lightly kissed her lips and felt complete, fulfilling joy. </div>
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Notes From A Ragamuffinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17069043314107879017noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1736332684256798907.post-28516731683559174062013-08-13T20:39:00.001-07:002013-08-13T20:39:56.838-07:00Penny Emerson // 9 & 10 Months<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">I totally skipped Penny's 9 month happenings so this is a post over the last few months. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">As always, her personality continues to develop and she gets more curious as she reaches another milestone. I have so much fun watching her play and discover. I'm finding that the older she gets, the more fun we have AND the stronger the trials become. Because she is so strong-willed and outgoing she is equally challenging and fun. She makes us laugh with all her quirks and she brings Truman and I closer as we continue to work as a team to raise her. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">Here are a few pictures from 9 months:</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">I love our tickle sessions so much. She laughs so hard she can't breathe. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">She loves her daddy.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">She experienced fireworks for the first time and it was hilarious to see her reaction. We were sitting right under them so it was pretty loud. At first she was scared, then she gave them the snuffy face because they were bright, and then she was in complete awe. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">10 month happenings:</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">There is no sitting still. She's constantly on the move, pulling herself onto things, climbing onto things. Anything she's not supposed to get into she will find. Every time. It's hard for me not to get frustrated when I have to constantly redirect her, but I have to remind myself that she doesn't know what's right or wrong (yet). Everything is new and exciting to her...even the nasty piece of plastic under the fridge that she is fascinated with. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">She rode the four wheeler for the first time this weekend while we were back in Central City. Her face was stunned the whole time. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">Though we have been finding it difficult to settle into Omaha, they have so many great activities to offer in the Summer. We took her to Jazz on the Green last week and she had a blast. She loves to be around all the action and attention. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">Milestones:</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">-standing by herself for about 30 seconds</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">-has three teeth poking through</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">-HAIR! Kind of :) It's getting fuller in the back. I'm sure she'll have a sweet mullet in no time. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">-learned how to give kisses (or she at least opens her mouth and leans forward so you can do it)</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">-LOVES to climb the stairs. She would do it for hours if I would let her. Because of the set up of our stairs, we don't have a gate. I have to watch her closely, but we decided we just want to teach her how to use them. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">-as I mentioned earlier, she is a very strong-willed girl. She definitely gets that from me. And even though there are obvious negatives to that personality (like screaming at the top of her lungs when she doesn't get her way) I think a go-getter personality can be a very good thing when channeled correctly. She is naturally a very loud baby. She screams and cries easily. I'm nervous/excited to teach her that it's okay to feel upset or sad when she doesn't get her way, but that it's not okay to act out. I'll need a lot of patience through this lesson :)</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">Things I don't want to forget:</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">-The way she rubs her blanky in her eye while I'm rocking her to sleep</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">-The very light, natural wave in the back tufts of her hair</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">-Watching her make herself laugh in the rear view mirror</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">-The way she giggles and dives into her blanky when I make waves with it</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">-The way she claps immediately after she takes a bite of food or gives a kiss</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">-Listening to her talk to herself from the other room as she drifts to sleep</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">-The way she aggressively crawls toward everything and starts to laugh, especially when she knows I'm chasing her from something she shouldn't be getting into. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">I am continually reminded at how blessed I am to be her mother. I'm thankful that we are the family God chose to put her in. She's a weirdo just like us and I'm thankful for the many fun memories we made over the summer as a family of three!</span></div>
Notes From A Ragamuffinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17069043314107879017noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1736332684256798907.post-30300428121636847462013-07-15T09:15:00.000-07:002013-07-15T09:16:46.449-07:00Worship Essentials<div style="text-align: center;">
Recently I confessed my frustration with the lack of variety and style on Christian radio stations. I have always been careful to bite my tongue on the issue because the most important thing about Christian music and radio is that it's inspiring us to worship Christ throughout my day. I also don't want to offend anyone who enjoys the music as-is on the radio currently. Worship is worship, whether it fits my style or not and ultimately it's a matter of the heart. So I want to explain that I understand that.<br />
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With that being said, I feel like there is a HUGE world of wonderful Christian music that many don't know about because, honestly, Christian music doesn't get a lot of advertisement. So the intention of this post is to share some of my worship essentials for those who are like me and are looking for a little variety. If you don't want to take the time to look these up yourself, you can just go to my Spotify playlist and listen here: <a href="spotify:user:123336901:playlist:2uRgqO76EBba5hiCALYb4k">Worship</a>. I update it every now and then when I come across a song or band that I really like. It's a wide range of stuff but it's like my own personal radio :)</div>
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My Essentials:</div>
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<b>1. Jars of Clay</b></div>
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If you grew up in the 90's I don't need to even explain. They will always be classic to me.</div>
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<b>2. Rich Mullins</b></div>
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I used to stick my nose up at Rich Mullins music because I didn't care so much for his style or voice, but as I've matured and studied how he lived his life I am drawn in by his incredible lyrics. Just do a little searching through his stuff and you're bound to find something. My favorite song is "Calling Out Your Name" and Chris Rice has a great cover of it. (On my worship playlist)</div>
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<b> 3. Chelsea Moon and Uncle Daddy</b></div>
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<b>4. The Lower Lights</b></div>
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<b> </b>These guys have some amazing covers of classic hymns. However, I feel like I need to state that they are Mormons and not every song is a hymn. So search wisely, but they have some really amazing stuff. </div>
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<b>5. Page CXVI</b></div>
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<img height="393" id="irc_mi" src="http://salvokat.files.wordpress.com/2011/09/pagecxvi_square.jpg" style="margin-top: 0px;" width="448" /> </div>
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These guys are probably one of my favorites. They have quite a few albums out (and recently announced a big project that will release albums during the major holidays). And for you mama's out there, they have an AMAZING lullaby album. My favorite.</div>
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<b>6. Bethel Music</b></div>
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One of my favorite songs.<b> </b></div>
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<b>7. Bethany Dillion</b></div>
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She does a cover of Rich Mullins' "You Did Not Have a Home" and it is incredible. This EP is one of my favorites.</div>
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<b>8. Ellie Holcomb</b></div>
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Wife of Drew Holcomb (of Drew Holcomb and the Neighbors). Sadly this is her only solo album out right now but it is one of my all. time. favorites. I read somewhere that she is working on a second, thank goodness!</div>
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<b>9. Hillsong United</b></div>
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Given.</div>
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<b>10. The Welcome Wagon</b></div>
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If you're a fan of Sufjan Stevens, you'll be a fan of this couple. Some of it gets a little too weird for my taste, but they have a version of "There Is a Fountain Filled With Blood" that I LOVE.</div>
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My list could go forever (it kind of did, sorry) and there are so many great songs out there (most of them on my playlist) that I wish I could share. And if you think I'm missing something please share! I love exploring new music. I hope you can find something you enjoy and something that ultimately allows you to worship Christ throughout your day.</div>
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Cheers, Jord.</div>
Notes From A Ragamuffinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17069043314107879017noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1736332684256798907.post-38425187882986190702013-07-07T14:31:00.000-07:002013-07-07T14:31:18.528-07:00Mini Vacation<div style="text-align: center;">
I love the lake.</div>
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I can only do it for a few days at a time until I start to feel hungry for the real world (or at least the comforts of it) but getting away and spending time with my family is always refreshing. </div>
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What I love most about the lake is that it requires very little. Simple food. Simple clothing. Simple entertainment. You sit around with people you love, laughing and telling stories (sometimes over and over again :), without needing to look at the clock. Everyone's without makeup, skin-drenched in sunscreen with dirty hair up and out of the way. Any attempt to be stylish and impressive is peeled away like a day-old sunburn. I strive for my life to be like that all the time. To focus more on the company and less on the image I display of myself (but more on that another time...). </div>
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I have great memories of growing up around the lake and it was special for me to introduce Penny to that little piece of my life. The family welcomed her with open arms (even the 6:30am alarm clock she came with) and she came home full of more love and empty of any energy she brought with her. That's how the lake should be.<br />
My family is the kind that refuses to let you have anything but a good time. They don't need much to be happy and that's what I love about them. Hobo's and silly yard games can only be fully enjoyed around them and I even willingly admit my genuine love for Journey, Boston, and Huey Lewis and the News...but only when they're around ;)<br />
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This is Penny's first experience of the lake! <br />
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Her favorite part was the sand. She dug around silently for probably an hour. Never once tried putting it in her mouth, just loved transporting it from one bucket to another. I absolutely love watching her discover new things!<br />
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Taking a nap on the deck.<br />
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10 weeks pregnant with little baby brother or sister! <br />
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I was a little tense at the thought of sand being EVERYWHERE, but after seeing how much fun she was having I got over that quickly. <br />
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We are so thankful for a little mini vacation to the lake. It wasn't easy with a 9 month old, but we still had a blast and we're looking forward to the many more summers to come!<br />
J.</div>
Notes From A Ragamuffinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17069043314107879017noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1736332684256798907.post-65480481861103297542013-07-03T09:09:00.000-07:002013-07-03T09:09:20.939-07:00Greener Grass<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Disclaimer: I am not a country girl. I’m hardly even a small-town girl. I grew up in a “smaller” town that was a wannabe city. My grandpa was a farmer. And my teenage-self stuck my nose up at the small town, country life because it was too old school. Oh, if only I would have understood how wonderful the country life could be at that age.<br /><br />A part of my heart belongs here in the po dunk town of Central City. And even though I didn’t grow up here, I fell in love with a man who did. I fell in love with a family who did. The slower pace of life. The empty gravel roads. The casual wave from the truck passing you by, even if they don’t know you. The fluffy, bright green rows of corn that surround your car and make you dizzy if you watch for too long. The overly expensive, quiet grocery store that plays country music as you shop. The sun rising up over the river. The fact that you can ACTUALLY see the sun setting into the ground, without all the ugly celebrity homes in the way. I could go on, but you get the point. <br /><br />The grass is literally greener in this part of the state. Well, at least there is much more of it and I have a hard time avoiding that mentality. Being in Omaha makes my heart ache for the small-town life. I long for a slow pace of life where you always see someone you know and where it only takes 5 minutes to get across town. I get breathless when we drive through the fields and I see pivots in the distance spraying mist over the corn, the sun turning it to gold. I want to jump out of my skin when the sun creates a haze over the distant trees. It’s all so familiar and I miss it so much. I think that’s the key; familiarity, comfort. I want to feel that comfort again. I grow weary of living in a faceless city where you can disappear if you want to. <br /><br />But here is where I’m convicted. God doesn’t guarantee a comfortable life. In fact, it’s quite the opposite if you choose to follow Jesus. He says it’s going to be hard. And it has been. And maybe the fact that I live in that faceless town allows me to so richly indulge in the wonderful beauty of the country…and even long for it. Maybe it’s the dream that I like. God has called us to be somewhere we aren’t comfortable at this time in our life I’m trying to remind myself that following Him means letting go of my dreams and asking “what do you want?” Or rather, saying “I’ll do anything, Lord. I’ll go where you lead me.” <br /><br />So for now, in this messy time of the unknown and unfamiliar, I will take a deep breath and sigh in content of the peace and quiet. Omaha makes the grass (or corn) greener, and it allows me to bask in the charms and comforts of the country. So thanks, Omaha. <br /><br />Signed,<br />A city, but closeted country girl. <br /><br /></div>
Notes From A Ragamuffinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17069043314107879017noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1736332684256798907.post-68715862362306382142013-06-28T09:24:00.000-07:002013-06-28T09:24:43.228-07:00Two Precious Lines<div style="text-align: center;">
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(Baby bean's first show: She & Him!) <br />
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Up to this point, my life is not at all what I expected it to be at age 23. And <i>praise God</i> for that!</div>
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As a teenager, I had big plans of leaving Nebraska as soon as I could and I dreamed of being a successful career woman. God had other plans :)</div>
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One great love and a baby later I found that my calling (and now one of my biggest passions) is to be a mother and a homemaker. There is nothing more fulfilling than being certain that I'm doing what I was created to do. Following God's plan works like that, I guess. </div>
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As Truman and I started our lives together I had dreams of a large family. Those dreams grew when Penny entered our lives. The beginning of motherhood was SO hard (and still is) but I felt whole as a mother. Giving life to one of God's children is a high calling and I was honored to be chosen to mother Penny. I couldn't shake the feeling of wanting to experience it all over again. I felt ready to continue growing our family, but God was telling me to be patient. I'm not good at the patience thing. Being young, married, with an intentional first baby is a rare thing in our culture. So the thought of a second baby so soon resulted in a long of strange responses. I wanted to check my motives. Was this a competition thing? Was I feeling like I needed to keep up? Was I unsatisfied with just one baby? (A ridiculous question, if you ask me.) Was I focusing too much on the future and not staying in the present? </div>
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After a lot of prayer with Truman, I realized that this desire for another baby wasn't about a status or number, but about continuing to do what God has called me to do: mother. The question was when was the timing right? Truman felt that it was best to wait until a suspected promotion with his job (he's rocking that, by the way). He got a promotion on May 29th. On May 30th I had two positive pregnancy tests. How's that for timing!? God sure does have a sense of humor. </div>
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As always, there are a lot of uncertainties ahead of us. I'm a few weeks away from being through my first trimester so I'm currently learning how to let go of my need for control (because I have none) and trust that God's plan is perfect. It's hard not to fear the "m" word but I'm daily having to give my fears to Him. I SO aware that two little ones really close in age is going to keep my hands full, but I embrace that! Lord willing, for the next 20+ years I will have a house full of kiddos making messes, playing loudly, spilling milk, and leaving grass-stained clothes everywhere. Taking care of my family is what I'm good at. It may not be good compared to someone else's standards and I only succeed by the grace of God, but if He chooses to bless us with multiple children then I say bring it on!</div>
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We are so excited for baby #2 and, once again, I'm left breathless at the creation of human life. </div>
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Cheers to a messy, chaotic, challenging, and FULL life!</div>
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(And if you're the praying kind, prayers that our little one makes it through the next few weeks would be appreciated. Thank you!)</div>
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J.</div>
Notes From A Ragamuffinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17069043314107879017noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1736332684256798907.post-60715185860538427182013-06-17T08:15:00.001-07:002013-06-17T08:19:00.284-07:00Summer Music Essentials<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhAeM4x0fCiIQJGLaxBzqd06mHJ9hpK7AJeveVac3uETTv6lR_ZXO-W-54fOMYG7XUFlSdiIMXwJ654eZCHLWGJJkvlERmljbIQMdzTHA0Ba5Jij-QI7hfbGyHK2m1hjWJPG5GX6KyKzS0/s1600/flower1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhAeM4x0fCiIQJGLaxBzqd06mHJ9hpK7AJeveVac3uETTv6lR_ZXO-W-54fOMYG7XUFlSdiIMXwJ654eZCHLWGJJkvlERmljbIQMdzTHA0Ba5Jij-QI7hfbGyHK2m1hjWJPG5GX6KyKzS0/s400/flower1.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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Now that summer is finally in full swing, I made a playlist :)</div>
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If you know me well, you know that I was probably born in the wrong era. Everything about the 50's, 60's and 70's inspires me (okay, except disco). I've been told that I have an old soul--I think that's accurate. The warm weather inspires me to bring out some of the greatest and put it in a playlist. It's the perfect list to join you during this warm, sunshine-y week!</div>
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Have a listen <a href="spotify:user:123336901:playlist:2Ih5Wemw1x5VvGNYv206iB">{here}</a></div>
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Happy Summer!</div>
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Jord<br />
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Oh, and P.S. Led Zeppelin was definitely supposed to be on that list, but Spotify is lame and doesn't have any of their stuff, meh. </div>
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Notes From A Ragamuffinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17069043314107879017noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1736332684256798907.post-49587551219577997962013-06-04T22:07:00.001-07:002013-06-04T22:07:09.231-07:00Penny Emerson : 8 Months<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
My sweet Penny girl seems so old. And I know more experienced moms laugh and think "just wait." But this month I have really seen her personality come alive. I can sense what she is going to be like when she's older. I am just purely filled with joy. I'm blessed beyond words to be living out my calling as a mother and spending my days with this little one.</div>
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<b> <i>Little P at 1 month!</i></b></div>
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She is officially on the move! It only took her a week to learn how to crawl and now that she knows how the girl won't. sit. still. I can't get quite as much done now that I have to keep an eye on her, but I just LOVE leaving the room for a second only to come back and find her propped up against her toy bin rummaging through toys. The amount of time I watch from a distance with a full heart would probably add up to a full day's worth of cleaning. Spying is much more fun :)</div>
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She plays shy. Make no mistake. This girl is not shy. But if she wants your attention she'll tilt her head. This has resulted in a few accidents with wooden booster chairs...oops.</div>
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Girlfriend is L.O.U.D. Holy cow. She screams, shrieks, yells, sings, the works. And she must get her pipes from grandma and aunt Kal because she can go forrrrevvveerrrr. She loves to hear herself. Especially in places where it echos...like every public place. Yep, we're THOSE people. Sorry. She's never mad or fussing so I can't really tell her to stop :) However, I can totally tell when she's chewing me out for something. It's hilarious now, but that will end during the toddler years :)</div>
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Since we are still a one car family, the days when I have the car are filled with running errands. She is such a trooper and LOVES to ride in the cart. She's always making friends with strangers and loves to kick her feet against the cart. If you stood at the opposite side of Hobby Lobby from us, I'm certain you could hear her. Again, sorry :)</div>
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She also loves the water. We haven't been able to swim much outside since June is being a stubborn Ox but I'm looking forward to spending many days at the pool!</div>
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She stood in two states at once for the first time while we were exploring the Bob Kerrey Pedestrian bridge. </div>
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She figured out how to peek above her crib when she woke up from her nap so many times I would walk past her room and see this tiny little head waiting for me to come and get her. Love it.</div>
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She loves being tossed in the air by daddy. She gets to giggling so hard. He'll come home from work, pick her up, and toss her in the air a couple times. It's a fun little ritual :)</div>
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We also visited the Holy Family Shrine for the first time. </div>
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We spend a lot of time swinging at the park in our neighborhood. </div>
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Had to finally put the crib down!</div>
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She found the door stopper. Lately I've been setting her in front of it while I do some cleaning. That wonderfully can entertain for quite a while!</div>
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And my absolute favorite: The Snuffy Face.</div>
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She started making this ridiculous face one night when I was changing her clothes. It's her "I'm not pleased" face. I cannot get enough of it.</div>
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Penny is very outgoing and strong-willed. She's loud and determined and very curious. When she's happy she is SO happy and when she's mad she'll let you know it. There is no playing quietly, she's a talker. I would be lying if I said I wasn't nervous for the times when we have to start teaching her and disciplining her more seriously. I want to be able to celebrate her fun and wild personality and I pray that God would give me to grace to know when to celebrate and when to mold. I am impatient, easily-discouraged, and quick to respond so this will be a learning process just as much for me as for her. I have struggled with feeling so unqualified to raise a child and most importantly be an example of Jesus to them, but a friend so kindly reminded me that God doesn't give us something because we're qualified. He qualifies us. It is so reassuring to know that I'm not doing this alone. </div>
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Notes From A Ragamuffinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17069043314107879017noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1736332684256798907.post-81297943577863020872013-05-23T08:24:00.000-07:002013-05-23T08:24:07.006-07:00Be Still, My Soul<div style="text-align: center;">
The other night was one of those perfect nights.</div>
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The sun seemed to linger a little longer, like it was refusing to set. The weather was the perfect temperature where we could open the windows and let the fresh air in. The wind was bringing in scents of lilac and freshly cut grass. We came home from our vacation to our front tree fully in bloom. The green seems much brighter since the winter just wouldn't leave us alone. And the sound of Truman mowing the lawn was the cherry on top. I don't know why, but listening to someone mowing the lawn is incredibly calming to me. Sounds of summer, I suppose.</div>
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I wanted to capture every moment that night. </div>
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I didn't want the perfect evening to end. I wanted that fresh, slightly breezy air to flow in forever. I captured a few photos for memory.<br />
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<i><b>Full, bright green tree.</b></i> <br />
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<i><b>Leaves consuming our front window.</b></i><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhVDCswGzjYQJlk8SFky8XunhvC0kIz933xVECJT5aviKxIgv600eZkLuHwZSEKHrCEh2xl-v3q-hzZ1lsx1GETjdk9fprPGN0PEyWcQW5gGu1XQD9roTatQAZezLbCQhknVC4sL7wSV6M/s1600/IMG_3511.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="266" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhVDCswGzjYQJlk8SFky8XunhvC0kIz933xVECJT5aviKxIgv600eZkLuHwZSEKHrCEh2xl-v3q-hzZ1lsx1GETjdk9fprPGN0PEyWcQW5gGu1XQD9roTatQAZezLbCQhknVC4sL7wSV6M/s400/IMG_3511.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
<i><b>Tiny baby feet discovering a chalkboard.</b></i><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjyWJNZP-gNC5VUz3LXGzk_Wv3H9MH_qO6RhDBz6Z8nkepueUVpLht4ITdrd3nFAEneGbhddsXcI5SY3x7qD7cVZX71NCkdbY3aczchGODNjbAN_F7vr2RUuXUJ6zkhFAfQYtOVU6gAtLw/s1600/IMG_3517.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="266" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjyWJNZP-gNC5VUz3LXGzk_Wv3H9MH_qO6RhDBz6Z8nkepueUVpLht4ITdrd3nFAEneGbhddsXcI5SY3x7qD7cVZX71NCkdbY3aczchGODNjbAN_F7vr2RUuXUJ6zkhFAfQYtOVU6gAtLw/s400/IMG_3517.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
<i><b>Fresh air blowing over the record player.</b></i><br />
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<i><b>Golden sun shining through lace curtains.</b></i><br />
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<i><b>Wind blowing through lace curtains.</b></i><br />
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<i><b>The sound of the lawn mower as I read.</b></i><br />
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<i><b>Gorgeous and intoxicating smell of our backyard lilac bush.</b></i><br />
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Lately we have been staring down the deep, dark tunnel of the future. We been having to discuss (over and over again...) the big, scary grown up questions of finding a new home, growing our family, budgeting differently, etc. There are times where I am completely trusting God, knowing that His plan is perfect and He will provide. There are also times when I still try to hold MY plans with a tight grip and attempt as much control as I can. And not to mention as Penny gets older and feistier I start to worry about if I'll be a good enough parent. It's not a matter of taking care of her and loving on her, I do that just fine, but I'm talking about being a good example of Jesus' love. Teaching her about his grace and living our lives as a family dependent totally on scripture. Discipline included. It's scary as hell. I don't want to screw it up. I know I will, but I'd like to do as little damage as possible. Only by the grace of God, I know, but I just feel so under-prepared sometimes. I'll-equipped, not good enough, not spiritually mature enough. I want that baby girl to love Jesus more than anything. And I want her to see that I love Jesus more than anything (and sometimes I have to honestly, humbly ask myself if that's true).<br />
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All of these heavy thoughts can fill my mind and almost suffocate me so I'm trying to make a very intentional effort to delight in the little things. I'm thankful for big questions like these that are approaching us. I'm SO thankful to be in this season of life. It's hard, it's rewarding. I'm also thankful for pretty shadows, perfume-scented trees, and bright green fluttering leaves. Sometimes those are the things that keep me going...<br />
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Signed,<br />
A frightened, but oh-so-thankful Jord.</div>
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Notes From A Ragamuffinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17069043314107879017noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1736332684256798907.post-54386092334471834742013-05-03T14:55:00.000-07:002013-05-03T14:55:02.359-07:00Balance<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I'm lying in bed trying to fight off yet another flu bug. This winter has been the worst. Penny and I just seem to be tossing sicknesses back and forth and it is definitely not something I'm used to. I very rarely get sick so being confined to my bed so often this year has been hard for me. </div>
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I have been a mother for 7 months now. I have spent every day trying to study Penny's cues and find the best routine for our family. I have days where I feel like I'm rocking it as a mom and days where I feel like I will never be able to figure it out. Lately I have been feeling overwhelmed with trying to find a healthy balance for everything. Because I have been spending the last 7 months totally focused on Penny and her needs, I have lost the priority of taking care of myself and I think I'm finally starting to feel the effects of it. </div>
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Moms, how do we do it all? How do we manage to fit in prayer time, exercising, and personal hygiene before we tackle the ridiculously long to-do list? How do we find time to engage our own hobbies like painting, crafting, or reading a book? How do we utilize those precious few hours of nap time by cleaning or meal planning while also making time to sit down and eat? And where in the heck do we find time to just sit and play with our babies amidst all of that? </div>
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These questions run through my head every day. And I can search and search online until my fingers are numb but I'm not finding the solutions I need. I know that in order to best care for my family I have to make caring for myself a priority. I find myself skipping lunch so I can check off a few more things on my to-do list or forgoing a shower so I can clean the bedroom and start the laundry. Even worse, my quiet time with God has become something that falls to the bottom of my list. If I get everything else done, then <i>maybe</i> I'll have some time for God before bed. </div>
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I know that realistically I have to accept that I won't be able to do it all. And I know very well that my value is not dependent on how clean my house is or how many home cooked meals are on the table each week, but I could use advice on the basics. Finding balance is much harder than I anticipated and if someone has the secret I want in on it!</div>
Notes From A Ragamuffinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17069043314107879017noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1736332684256798907.post-4902118414439931162013-04-22T11:50:00.002-07:002013-04-22T11:50:59.811-07:00Sick Day<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Last night was the first time I bawled as I watched my helpless baby suffer in sickness. </div>
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Penny's cold has turned into a terrible, terrible cough and left us with a rough couple of days. We put her pack n play next to my side of the bed last night so I could monitor her coughing. I sat quietly in our dark room with only the light of the computer screen while Tru and Pen slept. The room was humid and heavily scented of eucalyptus oil. My phone was softly playing white noise sounds next to me. The whole family, sleeping in one little room. Despite my anxiety of her returning cough, I was so happy in that moment. I was reminded of those first months of Penny's life when she slept right next to mama in her crib. At the time I was sleep deprived and completely miserable with breastfeeding but I miss it all so terribly now. Those moments were so fleeting and I'm thankful that I could re-live them last night. </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQahOaZRB0cPN0CbX6UU73RG7QQMEVnfmZRd5KqjMLnUDuzJEHRx-xrVzf2kXJf2Acvd8_JhtG05xpjrxgV4NF-p5rUfAHe3XpEsxExYwabU9gmB-_KwKZ4AC96uVdp79rn4wnWZMeaEg/s1600/sickday2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQahOaZRB0cPN0CbX6UU73RG7QQMEVnfmZRd5KqjMLnUDuzJEHRx-xrVzf2kXJf2Acvd8_JhtG05xpjrxgV4NF-p5rUfAHe3XpEsxExYwabU9gmB-_KwKZ4AC96uVdp79rn4wnWZMeaEg/s400/sickday2.jpg" width="300" /></a></div>
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I prayed heavily that the Lord would give me energy and endurance to care for her through the night and He did. She woke up a few times and as I scooped her up into my arms and fed her a bottle I felt her immediately relax. She was in her favorite spot, mama's arms. And as helpless as I felt, I knew that was the best thing I could give her. We snuggled into bed and I stroked that wonderful bald head until she drifted back to sleep. It's so true that even though it's awful when they're sick, they are SO cuddly. I will cherish those memories forever. </div>
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I'm thankful to say she's doing better today. </div>
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She's still a little fussier than usual so I'm trying to find things to make her giggle. The mirror never fails.</div>
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And she has been cracking up at this Fisher Price animal app I have on my phone. It's annoying as all get out but I'll play it over and over again if I can hear that laugh.</div>
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She's currently snuggled up in our bed and I'm listening to her breath as the rain falls. </div>
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My heart is full. I am thankful.</div>
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...and can I get a hallelujah for the week-long 70 degree weather we have approaching? It's. About. Time. </div>
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J.</div>
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Notes From A Ragamuffinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17069043314107879017noreply@blogger.com0